I thought that’s what I smelled on those Jersey guys at the bar this weekend.

Kelly and I were on the F train heading to midtown when we ran into this character. The video comes in about halfway through our conversation with him, but since his drunken ramblings made no sense anyways it doesn’t really matter.

Ridiculous claims made:

• Name is ‘Bond, James Commander’
• Is from Woodstock, NY, Bennington, VT and Hoboken, NJ
• Is 58, with 3 ex-wives, 4 kids, 2 grandsons and a Puerto Rican girlfriend who is addicted to crack (this one might be true)
• Is a chess master in Tompkins Square Park
• Kicked the wall down in Dresden; a Reagan man

Other notable moments:

• Having “Bullshersy” yelled in my face when I disagree with his claim that he’s from Woodstock
• Blowing his whistle for us— spitting all over Kelly’s face in the process
• Homeless guy tries to steal the camera while Kelly is using it, a very ballsy move
• We realize we are at our stop and leave while he is still talking

Bekyarov,

I appreciate you keeping me up to date on this and I look forward to seeing your work. Much respect to anyone who can make this disaster look presentable.

Thanks again,
Phil

Having always been a supporter of the Sony brand, it has been disappointing to watch it crash and burn over the past year due to the turmoil surrounding their latest offering to the gaming world— the PlayStation 3. This video, to the tune of The Fray’s “How to Save a Life,” points out some of the more obvious ways Sony killed its own brand. Granted Wii, PS3 and 360 all rhyme, this is still an awesomely creative song.

The gaming industry has changed drastically in recent years, and Sony has either overlooked or ignored this fact. When Microsoft entered the market with the Xbox in 2001, it changed the the dynamics of the industry as we once knew it. Strong brands such as Nintendo and Sony could no longer depend on platform loyalties like they had in the past. They needed to differentiate through innovation instead of simply making cosmetic improvements to past products.

Nintendo obviously got the hint— releasing the remarkably successful and innovative Wii. Microsoft found a niche with their online community, Xbox Live— enabling casual gamers like me to verbally berate 12-year-olds of superior skill. This is an obvious attempt to compensate for my inability to adapt to today’s overly complicated game play, but satisfying nonetheless. Sony, on the other hand, thought that the strength of it’s PlayStation brand would be enough for it to survive the platform wars. When Wii sales proved it wasn’t just a novelty and online communities revolutionized gaming, Sony was left reeling.

So what was the PS3’s fatal flaw? It’s simple— it was late, expensive and incompatible. When it was announced in spring of 2005, it had the opportunity to drive a stake through the heart of Nintendo by beating them to market with this next generation system. Nintendo effectively stole the PS3’s thunder by releasing the cheaper, more innovative Wii while Sony was still struggling with manufacturing delays. Cost was another major flaw. While the $600 price tag is actually quite reasonable for the amount of technology packed into this system, it makes it inaccessible to a majority of its target audience.

Ignoring the needs of the consumer was Sony’s most fatal flaw. Giving the consumer the option to buy these features on an à la carte basis, like the Xbox 360’s HD-DVD drive, would have made a tremendous difference. Forcing Blu-ray down our throats in an attempt to use influence to win the format wars was not well received. Ignoring gamers demand for online communities was just stupid. When the consumer is clear in what it wants, why wouldn’t you listen?

With all of this said, what is Sony’s only hope? That the PS3 spontaneously combusts like their batteries, destroying all evidence of this colossal mistake.

I knew it was only a matter of time before I wrote my first post about the Buffalo Sabres— and after the amount of heart they showed tonight, I couldn’t deny them any longer.

I’ve been a Sabres fan for as long as I can remember. Growing up in Buffalo you don’t really have a choice. We live and die with our sports teams— and games like tonight make me understand why. The Sabres came into tonight’s game against division rival Ottawa with a laundry list of injuries to many of our key players. Most teams wouldn’t stand a chance against an elite team like Ottawa with a bench full of rookies. But not Buffalo.

The games fast-paced momentum went back and forth until about 5 minutes into the 2nd period when Sabres captain Chris Drury caught an elbow to the face, causing a deep cut and a puddle of blood on the ice. From the second he hit the deck I knew this wasn’t going to be pretty. When the puck dropped on the ensuing face-off, it was on. What started as a few scattered fights turned into a brawl for the ages when goalies Martin Biron and Ray Emery left their creases to join the action at center ice. After the goalies were separated, Sabres enforcer and my personal hero Andrew Peters went toe to toe with Emery to prove a point.

Somewhere between the repeated haymakers to Emery’s face I realized something— this is what Buffalo is all about. This is why we have 18,000 screaming fans at every home game when other clubs can’t give their seats away. I’m not talking about the fighting (although it was awesome), but the loyalty that these guys have to each other. It’s a rare thing to find anymore, especially in professional sports, but something that is of the utmost importance to all Buffalonians. We go to the grave with our loyalties, and watching our team defend their fallen captain made me proud, honestly. Judging by the cheers from the crowd, I have a feeling I’m not alone. There’s a reason we are currently the best team in the NHL. It’s not just raw talent; it’s the never-say-die attitude that they play every game with. Few teams can match our skill, but even fewer teams can match our heart and determination. That’s what makes us the BUFFALO Sabres. Not any other team. Not any other city.

It’s easy to sing the praises of star talents like Ryan Miller, Danny Briere and Chris Drury. They are phenomenal players that have made us one of the most dangerous teams in the league. But, tonight was proof that sometimes a team needs more than someone to light the lamp. They need emotion. I’m sure as the playoffs get closer I will have more than enough opportunities to talk about Miller’s mind-boggling saves and Briere’s ice-cold blood, so I would like to dedicate this post to the goons. The guys whose passion to win exceeds their on-ice talent.

Thank you Andrew Peters, Adam Mair and the rest of you guys who have the balls to stand up to anyone and everyone in defense of a teammate. That’s something I can’t help but respect. Wear the Buffalo sweater with pride.

Oh, and we won 6-5 in a sudden-death shootout, incidentally. Had the outcome been different, the time spent writing this post would have instead been spent with a bottle of Jack Daniels. Did I mention we drink to solve our problems in Buffalo? Go Sabres!

For over a decade the Starbucks franchise has been spreading like a virus throughout the world, with new chains popping up daily. If you live in New York City, a Starbucks is no more than a block or two away, regardless of your location. In fact, my office is within 5 miles of 197 stores. (Yes, you read that correctly)

Aside from serving overpriced coffee, Starbucks now offers a wireless internet service through a partnership with T-Mobile. This service, which is used by many on-the-go New Yorkers, is offered for the not-so-nominal cost of $10 a day. Leave it to Starbucks to find an industry, severely overprice its product/service and still have people running back for more. I can’t understand stand it and I won’t support it. But, I would be more than happy to profit from it.

It is for these reasons that I would like to introduce you to FON. FON is offering a free router to anyone who lives within range of a Starbucks Wi-Fi signal. The idea is that you would use this router to share your broadband connection with Starbucks customers, or anyone in the area for that matter. While Starbucks is charging their customers $10 a day for their service, you can offer yours for a much more reasonable $2 a day. Of that $2, you collect $1 per user for your troubles. What an opportunity!

If $1 isn’t incentive enough, think of the feeling of satisfaction that comes with undercutting a faceless corporation! Although, that feeling will undoubtedly vanish when you spend your earnings on your morning latte. Damn this addiction!

I was glad to see the Orlando Magic big man find a way to innovate in a competition that often feels repetative. It’s a simple fact— you can only do so much while airborne. Participants have attempted to add originality to the competition with props, but nothing replaces a 40″ vertical.

Now this is definitely something I can support. Good to see the boys have a sense of humor about the situation over there. They’ve got some decent rhymes too.

As long as we’re on the topic, shout out to my boy Joey D. holding it down in Iraq. Stay safe bro. And as much as those sunglasses and new tats might make you look tough, we all still know bees make you scream like a girl.

In case you didn’t find the first line sexest enough, the second one was right there to set the feminist movement back a few decades. Who thought this was a good idea?

“No one disputes that an on-duty Irvine police officer got an erection and ejaculated on a motorist during an early-morning traffic stop in Laguna Beach. The female driver reported it, DNA testing confirmed it and officer David Alex Park finally admitted it.”

As long as nobody disputes this fact, the case against Officer Park should be open and shut, right? Evidently not. A jury of 11 men and 1 woman found the officer not guilty of three felony charges. The United States judicial system serves up a steaming dish of justice once again. God bless America.

But he admitted committing this disgusting and pathetic act. How could this be, you ask? The victim was a stripper (a.k.a. Defense Attorney’s dream). Let the character assassination begin.

“Park didn’t pick a housewife or a 17-year-old girl,” veteran sex crime prosecutor Kamiabipour said in her closing argument. “He picked a stripper. He picked the perfect victim.”

As horrible as that statement is, it’s hard to deny that it’s not true. We’ve seen enough cases just in the past year that support this grim reality. Apparently working at a place called the ‘Captain Cream Cabaret’ completely destroys your credibility. Go figure.

Read the full story here.